It's been a while since my last post, and for that I'm really sorry. I've had a bad case of migrane the last couple of days, and I've had shitloads of school asignments to do. And this will be just a short litte update.
I got my first comment a couple of days ago. And you who commented wondered if my mother got really sad or if she got mad. She got really sad, and she stayed that way for quite a while. But she's all better now, thank God.
I think I'll tell you about my first big love. His name was Joacim. He was never interested in me, and he'll never be, cause he's straight. But thats OK.
It all started back in my first year in High School. School had lasted about a month, when the teachers told us we had a new student in our class. He was a dancer, and I myself was a singer, so we had quite few hours together. Only Math, choir and dance, about 9 hours a week all together. We started of talking a lot, or, not a lot, but mostly about him, me and his twin brother, who were also in our class. For me it evolved into something more than just friendship.
I think you all know the feeling. The one who involves butterflies in your stomack, and a short throb in you heart ever time you se this special someone. I think I were in love with him for about 3 months without letting anyone know. I told a friend of mine in January, and I told him in March.
Most of my friends took it quite well, someone even clamed they knew, and just waited for me to realise it myself. That I was gay, that is. If you haven't gotten it yett, this is how I came out to all of my friends at school.
Joacim took it quite bad. Since he wasn't gay, he didn't want anything to do with me anymore. A stolker kind of friend of his got the hold of my IM adress, and started threatening me. He said things like "Joacim is mine" and "If you ever speak to him again, I'll kick your ass" and so on. I felt really scared, and since noone in my family knew about me being gay, I had noone to share it with. So, what I did next, I still feel kind of ashamed about. I came out to my brother by texts.
The worsth way, if you ask me.
To be continued.
I'm sorry about the poor structure in all of my posts, since they're not following a timeline. I just write as the memories come back to me.